If wishes were horses, beggars would ride

if-wishes-were-horsesIt’s much easier to “stick it to the man” when you’ve never met the man.

“If” the beginning of every residential real estate transaction were the buyers and the sellers and their agents meeting and chatting, maybe having dinner together and a drink or two for an hour. Then everyone walks through the house together while the seller tells the buyer the story of their life in the house and the buyer and agents ask questions. Then the offer is written, and proceeds through the inspections to find things the seller just truly doesn’t know about. At the end of the transaction when all items and terms are fully negotiated, the buyer comes into the room with a check in his hand. The seller comes into the room with the keys to all doors and garage door openers and manuals on appliances. The agents review the final numbers and nod to the closing agent.

Everyone smiles and shakes hands after the seller gets his check from the closing agent, and the seller hands over the keys to the new owner and wishes them much luck in the home they have lived in, and now pass forward to the new owners.

Believe it or not, that is how many of my original real estate transactions transpired, once we achieved balanced market conditions. For the past several years, more often than not, the buyers and sellers never even meet each other. The Seller’s Agent never meets the buyer and the Buyer’s Agent never meets the seller. The playing field seems to get nastier when it becomes a true buyer’s market or seller’s market. For the first time in many years, I am starting to see transactions that are more civil and fair to both parties.

I’ve been in this business long enough to see both buyer markets and seller markets. I’m still happiest when the market is balanced and all parties have met each other and treated one another with dignity and respect. I wish it were always so, but then, “if wishes were horses, beggars would ride…and there’d be no work for tinkers.”

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About ARDELL

ARDELL is a Managing Broker with Better Properties METRO King County. ARDELL was named one of the Most Influential Real Estate Bloggers in the U.S. by Inman News and has 33+ years experience in Real Estate up and down both Coasts, representing both buyers and sellers of homes in Seattle and on The Eastside. email: ardelld@gmail.com cell: 206-910-1000

14 thoughts on “If wishes were horses, beggars would ride

  1. Ardell-

    I think I’m going to suggest a plaque in our office with your quote and credits to you. I vote for the best post of the year with the potential for greatest impact, hands down.

    The idea of people getting together, even over a cup of coffee, to discuss the parties aspirations or transaction points could help to put deals in a different light and more importantly, salvage a shaky transaction on the cusp of faliure. Too often, a described apple gets turned into an orange during a deal, controlling parties eager for the upper hand stifle progress and ego’s that don’t allow a perfectly normal transaction to blossom on it’s own.

    I’m glad that you are starting to see things more civil because nothing is more discouraging as an escrow agent (and I’m sure all escrow offices staff can relate) than to listen to bickering between parties and agents during escrow, only to be caught in the middle thinking, “gosh, these people never intended for this to happen or this is not what they said at all.”

    We had a $900,000 dollar sale implode about three weeks ago for petty things that were blown way out of proportion, in my opinion. It’s too bad these parties couldn’t meet and work it out as you suggest. Darn shame to have all the parties start over again, never mind the potential for actually losing the customer and the commissions earned on a deal.

    People should take to heart the The Waiter Rule held by CEO’s testing the behavior of Corporate Officer job applicants. The way you treat others in a position of power tells a lot about your character.

  2. Ardell-

    I think I’m going to suggest a plaque in our office with your quote and credits to you. I vote for the best post of the year with the potential for greatest impact, hands down.

    The idea of people getting together, even over a cup of coffee, to discuss the parties aspirations or transaction points could help to put deals in a different light and more importantly, salvage a shaky transaction on the cusp of faliure. Too often, a described apple gets turned into an orange during a deal, controlling parties eager for the upper hand stifle progress and ego’s that don’t allow a perfectly normal transaction to blossom on it’s own.

    I’m glad that you are starting to see things more civil because nothing is more discouraging as an escrow agent (and I’m sure all escrow offices staff can relate) than to listen to bickering between parties and agents during escrow, only to be caught in the middle thinking, “gosh, these people never intended for this to happen or this is not what they said at all.”

    We had a $900,000 dollar sale implode about three weeks ago for petty things that were blown way out of proportion, in my opinion. It’s too bad these parties couldn’t meet and work it out as you suggest. Darn shame to have all the parties start over again, never mind the potential for actually losing the customer and the commissions earned on a deal.

    People should take to heart the The Waiter Rule held by CEO’s testing the behavior of Corporate Officer job applicants. The way you treat others in a position of power tells a lot about your character.

  3. Tim,

    The sad thing is that it is totally within our power to civilize the process. Today I have arranged for a buyer and seller to meet, with agent supervision, to review the home inspection results. Not to negotiate, but to clarify some points prior to negotiation. To do that you need all parties to be reasonable and respectful of each other’s interests, including the agent on the other side.

    I know Russ says that what I do as a single agent, vs. the industry at large, is of no consequence particularly with regard to buyer agent fees. But I still believe we change the world everytime we promote change…albeit in very small doses.

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